I used to have a slew of bad habits, I’m talking shit that really held me back– things that made me feel bad, look bad and seem like I was working against myself. It made no sense at all but I felt like I couldn’t stop, like I couldn’t help myself…I thought I had demons.
It was weird!! I would do things that I wished I didn’t do but couldn’t stop doing them…
As I got older I started to understand myself better and learned more about psychology, physiology and the human experience…why we are the way we are and why we do certain things.
I realized that we don’t have demons, we just have bad habits. I guess bad habits can be like demons if you don’t understand them and then know what to do about them.
We develop a lot of habits at an early age, many in the womb I believe. They are so deeply engrained in us that it feels like we’re hardwired. Habits are like our ways of life, how we behave day-to-day, cope with problems, celebrate joy and in general how we take care of ourselves and live.
These behaviors are cemented deeply within us, physiologically and neurologically.
Physiology is the scientific study of our mechanisms and their interactions, within living systems, within us.
Neurological pathways are the patterns or ways information travels within us, between the brain and our cells.
Basically, we do things on autopilot, we do what we know or what we’ve always known…consciously and unconsciously. The thing is, though, these things should be deliberate and we should be cognizant of the choices we’re making. We don’t want to just flow along where life takes us, we want to participate and be in control.
And we can!
We simply need to identify the bad habits we want to remove and decide better habits we’d like to replace them with.
The key word is REPLACE. Deciding the habits you want to get rid of is only a piece of the puzzle; you must identify new habits to replace them with; so you’re not just removing, but adding as well.
Then we need to condition that into our systems, like a sport! Like learning or exercise, or like resistance training. It’s not easy, but it’s simple.
Think of this as emotional exercise.
Before anything, though — it’s important to realize that our childhoods are not “who we are,” it was just the time when we learned most of our habits and beliefs…but these patterns can change. We need to let go of the past and decide who we want to be, then we need to move in that direction…tiny little actions in the direction of our dreams add up to lasting change.
To channel Tony Robbins here, we need to associate the old bad habits with pain and the new good habits with pleasure. Say that with me, bad habits get associated with pain and good habits with pleasure. Say it, think it and act on it. Over time, you will change your ways.
To sum it up:
Happy weekend, xx, B.